Media Monday: The R House, failed placement

We love reading the R House blog and hearing of her adoption expertise. We had the opportunity of hosting her when she came out here for an FSA conference. She recently experienced a failed placement. She wrote a very touching post the day after they found out the birth mom was going to parent instead of placing her baby for adoption. You can read that post here. So tender, sweet and powerful. I love how supportive she is of the birth mother and her decision, even though it was hard for the R family.

Two weeks after that, she wrote another post about how to survive a failed adoption. I love her optimism through the heart break. You can read it here.

These two posts are so powerful and tear jerking. What an incredible family!

Media Monday: American Idol, Creighton Frakes

I meant to post this last week when he was still on American Idol, but that didn't happen. I love watching American Idol and was surprised to hear that one of the contestants was adopted. I loved hearing his story of how he got to meet his birth father about 3 years ago and that he found out that he got his love of music from his birth father. It was also his birth father that encouraged him to try out for American Idol. I loved hearing that they have an open relationship now and his birth father even came out to support him as he was on the show. Such a great story!

You can see some of his videos here.

Media Monday: Birth father's thoughts about adoption

We came across this touching post from a birth father on the Birthmothers for Adoption blog (see link on the right side of our blog). A birth father shares his experience with adoption and his thoughts about placing, about adoptive couples, etc. You can read it here.

We love that he says "we are heroes to our child's adoptive parents". We could not agree more! We disagree with him when he says that pre-placement contact with birth parents and adoptive couples is "tedious and gut-wrenching". We know our son's birth parents looked forward to spending time with us and it reassured them to know the choice they were making was right. We loved getting to know them as much as we could since they were (and are) such a big part of our family now. We respect his understanding and sincerity of what the adoptive couple goes through (with the adoption and with infertility). Our favorite part is where it says "We, as Birthfathers, are the answer to our child’s adoptive parent’s prayers.We are the bright light piercing through the darkness that has become their lives."

Nothing could be truer than that!!

Media Monday: Birth Mom's decision to place

I love reading The R House blog. It is so inspiring, real and wonderful! A few days ago, a guest blogger birth mom posted her story on her decision to place her son for adoption (with Mrs. R and her hubby). It was written so beautifully. You can read it here.

I love how the emotions are so real, raw and beautiful. I love how she realizes that when she thinks about parenting, it is all about her and what she wants. However, when she thinks about (and decides on) placing him for adoption, it is all about her son. There isn't a greater love than to do something that is hard for ourselves in order to help those we love. Birth parents should forever be honored and praised for their courage to place their children for adoption. We, personally, have two amazing birth parents that we will forever respect, honor and love!

Overcome!

(the pic above was at the Denver Temple when Chase was about 1.5 months old)

It has been a REALLY long time since I have posted something. Sorry about that! We have been loving baby Chase and having fun with Caden. Today was a special day. I was able to call the Denver LDS Temple and schedule a time to be sealed to Chase (for more info on LDS temples or the sealing ordinance, see this link). This means that he will always be a part of our family, both in this life and after death. As I was talking thedule it, I was overcome with a flood of different emotions.

1. Gratitude - We feel eternally grateful for two very special people that were willing to place Chase for adoption with our family. Tears are welling up in my eyes when I think about them and what they have done. They were a huge answer to our prayers. We love them. We love having an open adoption where they can see Chase grow and he can know just how much they love him too. Caden continues to say thanks to God for A & J in every prayer. Words can't fully express the gratitude we feel for A & J!

2. Love - We love baby Chase so much!! He is a true angel in our home and he has already added so much to our family. It is fun to watch Caden grow and change into his role of big brother. He is learning how to put his needs aside to help his brother first. He LOVES to make him smile and laugh and I can tell they have a very special relationship. Russ's and my hearts swell with love and joy as we hold baby Chase, see him smile, hear him laugh, watch him sleep, etc. We truly do love him and Caden more than anything and would do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING we could to help them.

3. Joy - For 4 years, we struggled with infertility and miscarriages and the heart ache that comes with that. We loved Caden and gave thanks for him every day in our prayers, but we knew there was somebody else that needed to come to our family. After 6 miscarriages and 2 years of getting approved to adopt and searching for the right opportunity, we were able to be with A & J when Chase was born. The first time we heard him cry, we held each other as tears of joy came to our eyes. Chase is the special baby that was supposed to come to our family, in the time that he came, by those loving birth parents. It isn't a coincidence, it is a miracle. He adds so much joy, love and peace to our home. Our hearts are so happy.

4. Excitement - When we were getting approved to adopt, we talked with Caden about the whole process. We also shared with him that after we adopted, our whole family (including Caden) would be able to enter the LDS temple to have the baby sealed to us. We have been looking forward to it for a long time and now it is almost here (a little over two months)! It will be such a special, sacred event!

No post can be complete without a picture, so here are some recent pics of Caden and Chase (big brother and little brother).

Media Monday: Flora's Family

Flora's Family by Annette Aubrey

We gave it 4.5 out of 5 stars

Here is a summary from Adoptive Families

Flora is a little girl, living happily with her family. One evening after bathtime, Flora notices that she doesn’t look much like her mom. Her long, flowing black hair doesn’t match her mother’s short, blonde bob. She doesn’t have her mom’s freckles either. Flora needs answers. So Mom and Dad tell her the story of how and why they adopted her.

Flora’s Family is a sweet and sensitively told, rhythmic tale. Author Annette Aubrey explores the common questions that young children have about their adoption. She goes one step further, reassuring Flora that her questions are welcome and will always be answered by her loving family. The book is illustrated by Patrice Barton, whose soft watercolors depict the contentment of Flora’s family life.

The final page of Flora’s Family offers suggestions that parents and teachers can use to answer questions and encourage meaningful discussion about adoption. For parents who want to begin a dialogue with their child, but are unsure of where to start, these talking points are a godsend.

Our Thoughts: We love how open they are in talking to their child about adoption. We especially like how both parents are involved in answering the questions the daughter has about being adopted. We love how it talks so positively about birth parents! We love that it is a family similar to ours, because they have biological children too. We love that it shows how the biological children love and adore their baby sister, because Caden is so excited to be a big brother. He ADORES Chase and they are such good buddies.

Media Monday: We Belong Together: A Book about Adoption and Families

We Belong Together: A Book about Adoption and Families by Todd Parr

We give it 4 out of 5 stars.

You can read it here on Google Books.

Here is a summary from Good Reads:
In a kid-friendly, accessible way, this book explores the ways that people can choose to come together to make a family. It's about sharing your home and sharing your heart to make a family that belongs together.

Our Thoughts: This book is a very simple description of adoption. It would be easy to read, especially to a younger child. It has bright pictures and only a few words per page, so it would keep their interest well. The use of different colors for kids shows racial adoption well. This book includes mothers and fathers, which we love.