Media Monday: Once Upon a Baby

We found out about this great new book, "Once Upon a Baby" by Shari Guess, from the National FSA blog. It sounded so great and we wanted to read it! We are in charge of putting together the swag bags for the upcoming area conference for our Colorado chapter of Families Supporting Adoption, so we immediately contacted the author to get some things for the bags and the giveaway. We were so excited when it came in the mail and we could read it!

Here is her summary: A heartwarming tale of LDS Adoption. Follow a child's journey from the pre-existence to his family's home on Earth. The divine guidance of the Savior, along with the love and prayers of both birth and adoptive parents are gently and lovingly portrayed in this tender story of the ultimate "Happily ever after".

Our thoughts: We love the way that this book talks about adoption from a religious perspective. We love how it talks about all the prayers from both the birth and adoptive parents. We love how positively it talks about "tummy mommies" and how much they love their child. It is a very sweet story and we especially love how it talks about the family going to the temple to be sealed. Great book!

You can find out more about the book here at her site: http://www.onceuponababybook.com/

Media Monday: The R House, failed placement

We love reading the R House blog and hearing of her adoption expertise. We had the opportunity of hosting her when she came out here for an FSA conference. She recently experienced a failed placement. She wrote a very touching post the day after they found out the birth mom was going to parent instead of placing her baby for adoption. You can read that post here. So tender, sweet and powerful. I love how supportive she is of the birth mother and her decision, even though it was hard for the R family.

Two weeks after that, she wrote another post about how to survive a failed adoption. I love her optimism through the heart break. You can read it here.

These two posts are so powerful and tear jerking. What an incredible family!

Media Monday: American Idol, Creighton Frakes

I meant to post this last week when he was still on American Idol, but that didn't happen. I love watching American Idol and was surprised to hear that one of the contestants was adopted. I loved hearing his story of how he got to meet his birth father about 3 years ago and that he found out that he got his love of music from his birth father. It was also his birth father that encouraged him to try out for American Idol. I loved hearing that they have an open relationship now and his birth father even came out to support him as he was on the show. Such a great story!

You can see some of his videos here.

Media Monday: Birth father's thoughts about adoption

We came across this touching post from a birth father on the Birthmothers for Adoption blog (see link on the right side of our blog). A birth father shares his experience with adoption and his thoughts about placing, about adoptive couples, etc. You can read it here.

We love that he says "we are heroes to our child's adoptive parents". We could not agree more! We disagree with him when he says that pre-placement contact with birth parents and adoptive couples is "tedious and gut-wrenching". We know our son's birth parents looked forward to spending time with us and it reassured them to know the choice they were making was right. We loved getting to know them as much as we could since they were (and are) such a big part of our family now. We respect his understanding and sincerity of what the adoptive couple goes through (with the adoption and with infertility). Our favorite part is where it says "We, as Birthfathers, are the answer to our child’s adoptive parent’s prayers.We are the bright light piercing through the darkness that has become their lives."

Nothing could be truer than that!!

Media Monday: Birth Mom's decision to place

I love reading The R House blog. It is so inspiring, real and wonderful! A few days ago, a guest blogger birth mom posted her story on her decision to place her son for adoption (with Mrs. R and her hubby). It was written so beautifully. You can read it here.

I love how the emotions are so real, raw and beautiful. I love how she realizes that when she thinks about parenting, it is all about her and what she wants. However, when she thinks about (and decides on) placing him for adoption, it is all about her son. There isn't a greater love than to do something that is hard for ourselves in order to help those we love. Birth parents should forever be honored and praised for their courage to place their children for adoption. We, personally, have two amazing birth parents that we will forever respect, honor and love!

Media Monday: Flora's Family

Flora's Family by Annette Aubrey

We gave it 4.5 out of 5 stars

Here is a summary from Adoptive Families

Flora is a little girl, living happily with her family. One evening after bathtime, Flora notices that she doesn’t look much like her mom. Her long, flowing black hair doesn’t match her mother’s short, blonde bob. She doesn’t have her mom’s freckles either. Flora needs answers. So Mom and Dad tell her the story of how and why they adopted her.

Flora’s Family is a sweet and sensitively told, rhythmic tale. Author Annette Aubrey explores the common questions that young children have about their adoption. She goes one step further, reassuring Flora that her questions are welcome and will always be answered by her loving family. The book is illustrated by Patrice Barton, whose soft watercolors depict the contentment of Flora’s family life.

The final page of Flora’s Family offers suggestions that parents and teachers can use to answer questions and encourage meaningful discussion about adoption. For parents who want to begin a dialogue with their child, but are unsure of where to start, these talking points are a godsend.

Our Thoughts: We love how open they are in talking to their child about adoption. We especially like how both parents are involved in answering the questions the daughter has about being adopted. We love how it talks so positively about birth parents! We love that it is a family similar to ours, because they have biological children too. We love that it shows how the biological children love and adore their baby sister, because Caden is so excited to be a big brother. He ADORES Chase and they are such good buddies.

Media Monday: We Belong Together: A Book about Adoption and Families

We Belong Together: A Book about Adoption and Families by Todd Parr

We give it 4 out of 5 stars.

You can read it here on Google Books.

Here is a summary from Good Reads:
In a kid-friendly, accessible way, this book explores the ways that people can choose to come together to make a family. It's about sharing your home and sharing your heart to make a family that belongs together.

Our Thoughts: This book is a very simple description of adoption. It would be easy to read, especially to a younger child. It has bright pictures and only a few words per page, so it would keep their interest well. The use of different colors for kids shows racial adoption well. This book includes mothers and fathers, which we love.

Media Monday: Rock Center with Brian Williams

I love watching the news at night. Last Monday as I was watching Rock Center with Brian Williams, they did a story about a family that adopted two girls out of Haiti. I love how it shows the great love the family has for their girls, even before they had the girls living with them. . I love that the Mom says it was her goal to let her daughter (Naika) know that she was a member of the family forever. I love that it talks about how they felt it was the right place and right time to adopt their girls. They could tell the Lord was guiding them there. What a touching story:

http://rockcenter.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/01/12/10139203-on-assignment-visiting-haiti-two-years-after-earthquake

Also, they mentioned on the show that on their website they had a story about parents that placed their daughter in an orphanage to be adopted. I was very intrigued and had to check it out. Here is the link to the video:

http://video.msnbc.msn.com/rock-center/45936629#45933485

I love how it talks about how much they love their daughter and that they put her in the orphanage to place her for adoption because they wanted the best for her. They talked about how they made the decision with faith in God. It was obviously hard for them, but they did it so that their daughter wouldn't have to suffer like they currently are.

Media Monday (a day late): Mom reunites with biological child 77 years later

I was all set to write this entry yesterday and then our internet was having problems! Bummer! Russ came to the rescue when he got home at night, and now I am able to post this!

My friend from the Colorado chapter of Families Supporting Adoption found an incredible article about adoption and posted it on the blog. It is about a reunion of an adoptee and her birth mom. It is a very touching article. You can read it here: http://www.ksl.com/?nid=157&sid=18711325

Our thoughts: We love how it shows the great love that birth moms have for the babies that they place for adoption. Sometimes there is a misconception that birth moms do not love their babies and are just placing them for adoption to get on with their lives. NOTHING could be farther from the truth!! It is because birth moms love their babies so much that they are willing to suffer themselves to be able to give their babies more. We also loved the joy that their relationship brought to them. Open adoption really is about having more love and joy for all those involved. Very amazing article!

Media Monday: God Found us You

God Found us You by Lisa Tawn Bergren

We give it 4.5 out of 5 stars!

Here is a summary from Christianbook.com:
When a little fox cub climbs into bed, he asks his mom about how he came to live with her. As she tucks him in, she tells the miraculous story of his arrival---and assures him that he made her "the happiest mama in the world." A tenderly told tale that captures the blessings of adoption.

Our Thoughts: We love the tender, open, loving conversation they have about adoption. We also love that it talks about how they had to wait. We love that it is based on faith and the belief that "God found us you". It says "I trusted that God knew you, and knew me, and knew when we'd fit perfectly together". That is such a sweet and true statement! We love how Mama talks positively about the birth mom, saying how the birth mom must have prayed a lot. We love that it says that the adoptive parents prayed for the birth mom as well. In an adoption talk we watched from the Families Supporting Adoption International Conference, it said that adoptive families and birth families are swapping prayers. What a great blessing adoption is! We pray for the birth parents and they pray to find the right family for their child. God answers both the prayers and connects the two couples to each other. Once again, the only thing we would change is to add the father to the story.

Media Monday: Beautiful Heartbreak

A friend of mine sent me a link to a youtube video of a new song by Hillary Weeks called "Beautiful Hearbreak". It brought me to tears and I loved how it applied to infertility and adoption. Apparently Birthmothers 4 adoption had the same thought, only applying it to placing a child for adoption. The lyrics to this song are amazing, and her story is even more moving.



Here are her words: Placing my birth daughter for adoption in 2008 was the hardest thing i have ever had to do. It was heartbreaking. But with this heartbreak I also felt love, peace, and comfort knowing I was doing the right thing for my baby girl. My life has changed because of her. To learn more of my story and read others like it go to birthmothers4adoption.blogspot.com

For more of her story about making this video, check out this post: http://birthmothers4adoption.blogspot.com/2011/11/my-beautiful-heartbreak.html

I am so grateful that she took the time to make this video to show just how much it hurts to place a baby for adoption, but that it turns out to be a blessing and that it takes them (and adoptive couples) to places they would never see if it weren't for this challenge. LOVE IT!!

Media Monday: Families Supporting Adoption fireside

In honor of National Adoption Awareness month, Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) hosted a special fireside to celebrate adoption! We had three speakers, and a special musical number with a slide show. The whole night was great!!

(For a few highlights from last year's fireside, check out this post)

The first speaker was a friend of ours that was adopted when she was a baby. She shared a great quote that said something like "in the end, love was stronger than blood". She talked about how grateful she was to her birth mom (who she has never met and knows very little about) because she gave her a chance to be raised in the family she was supposed to be in. She also talked about when her parents adopted both of her younger sisters and how she "instantly" loved them so much. Love isn't limited to a blood relation, but for those that are willing to open their hearts, it can be shared with anyone. This is especially true for adoption.

The second speaker was a birth mom that placed her baby with our friends. She was so honest and open about the highs and lows of placing a baby for adoption. We loved that she was so full of love, not just for her baby, but also for the adoptive parents. She talked about how she knew when she saw the adoptive couple that they were the parents for her child. She was so selfless during labor, because she wanted to let the adoptive mom experience the birth of a child. She was an amazing, fun and loving woman!

The third speaker was our friend that adopted the baby placed by the second speaker. It was so awesome to hear both sides of the story. We were very touched by the love that the birth parents and adoptive couple had for each other, and we loved that they gave each other a huge hug after they spoke. She was so sincere about the struggles of infertility and coming to grips with adoption for their family. She was so emotional when she talked about her open relationship with the birth mom and her love for her boy.

The special musical number was "Something Perfect" by Michael McLean. Our friend did a great job singing! The lyrics are so awesome and very applicable to adoption. There was a slide show during the song with pics of adoptive couples in the area, birth parents, kids and activities from FSA.

The whole night was amazing! It was so great to celebrate adoption and the way that it blesses the lives of all those involved!

Media Monday: Adoption Story Time

In honor of National Adoption Awareness month, Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) got a local library to host a special story time all about adoption. It was awesome!! The librarian read a few children's books about adoption, including A Mother for Choco (one of our faves, see our review here). A ton of friends from FSA were there and it was so fun to chat with all of them and to let the kids play together. I love the opportunity to let other people see just how amazing adoption is and to create some positive views of adoption!

FSA also hosted a fireside to celebrate adoption. More on that next Monday!

Media Monday: A Beautiful Disaster

I came across this wonderful blog post, which is a letter from a birth mom written to her daughter. It is so sincere, honest and beautiful. I just loved it!

Here is the link: http://missmandapassarelli.blogspot.com/2011/11/dear-hannah-letter-from-your-birth.html

Here are a few of our favorite quotes:
"I gave you a better life then I could have given you at the time. I gave you two wonderful parents and a big sister to take care of you. I gave you happiness and the opportunity to excel and follow your dreams."

"But I am so glad we have this beautiful thing together. Its like our two families have become one. A very unique and special one. It is so wonderful that your parents let this be so open and honest."

"So again Hannah, I LOVE YOU. WE LOVE YOU. Please do not ever forget that. Placing you for adoption wasn't easy, it was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but it was the best thing I ever did for you. You mean the world to me, beautiful."

Our Thoughts: This letter is so sweet! We love so much about it. We love that Amanda (the birth mom) is so honest that placing her daughter for adoption was the hardest thing, but also the best thing. We love that she has an open relationship with the adoptive couple. We love how it says that their two families have become one. Chase's birth parents (J and A) will forever be a part of our family because we share something so unique, precious and beautiful. This letter from the birth parent is a must read!

Media Monday: The Red Blanket

The Red Blanket by Eliza Thomas.

We gave it 3.5 out of 5 stars.

Here is a summary from Adoptive Families:
Children adopted anywhere will cuddle up to this story of a little girl, a loving single mom, and the cozy blanket that eased their transition from strangers to family.

The story of PanPan’s adoption is told from her mother’s perspective. As she explains her desire for a child, her sadness is palpable, but there’s no self-pity. Adoption can solve this problem, so Thomas gets down to work. When she receives her referral for PanPan, she buys all the usual baby gear plus a soft red blanket, perfect for cuddling. Into the suitcase it goes, and Thomas heads for China.

At the orphanage, deliriously happy with her new baby in her arms, Thomas notices that PanPan won’t meet her gaze. Building attachment will take time and effort, consistency, faith, and patience. In their hotel room, Thomas talks encouragingly about their new life together, but she recalls, “you weren’t listening. Instead, you looked around the room at the chair, the bed, the bureau….You looked everywhere but at me.”

After a day of rejection, Thomas remembers the red blanket tucked away in her suitcase and cuddles her daughter in it. At last, with PanPan snuggled in the warm folds of that soft blanket, the two begin to bond.

Our Thoughts: This book is about international adoption and does a good job of relating to what the mom and the child are feeling. There is no father present in the story, which is sad. We love the idea of having a special blanket for the child to hold and cherish.

Media Monday: Max and the Adoption Day Party

Max and the Adoption Day Party by Adria F. Klein

We gave it 4 out of 5 stars.

You can read it on Google Books.

Here is a brief summary from Good Reads:
It is Maxs friend Josés adoption day party. There is cake and ice cream, games, and presents. What special present did Max bring?

Our Thoughts: This book also comes in Spanish! We have read it in both languages, since Caden is bi-lingual. We love that this is also an easy reader, that Caden can read all by himself! We LOVE the idea of an adoption day party! There is nothing better for a kid to celebrate with a party, and this helps his friends and family celebrate the miracle of adoption with him. We are definitely going to do this!

Media Monday (or Wednesday): Conversations at the Park

Sorry this post is late! We have been loving on Chase and not getting as many other things done as we used to.

Sometimes our interactions with others are the best media available. We had a great experience with the power of open adoption recently.

Last Saturday, we went to the park with Chase's birth parents to get pictures done with them. We had a great time seeing them (as always) and Caden loved playing at the park. One sweet older lady started talking to us, trying to guess who Chase's parents were. We told her that we adopted him and that A and J were the birth parents. She started talking about how neat that was that we were still in contact with each other. She said "I hope you know how special this is to me". "That makes me want to cry. That is just so special".

She meant every word of it. We reassured her it was even more special to us! We LOVE open adoption and the way that it allows more people to love, hold, kiss and be with a very special baby. We have already seen the blessings of open adoption and are excited to continue seeing those blessings for years to come with A and J.

Media Monday: My Adopted Child, There's No One Like You

My Adopted Child, There's No One Like You by Kevin Leman & Kevin Leman II

We gave it 4 out of 5 stars

Here is a summary from Christianbook.com
This delightful story, filled with colorful illustrations, is designed to be read by parents and their adopted children with one goal in mind: to show them just how special and loved they are. Your child will realize that while your family is "different," it is a family built on love both from the birth mother who gave them up for adoption and the adoptive family who chose them. Perfect for children ages 3 and up.

Our Thoughts: It seems like this was the first discussion that they had about adoption, but we would rather have our child know about adoption as early as possible. We love that Mama Bear in this story welcomed any questions he had and was willing to give him information about who he was. We are going to create an environment for our child to feel willing to ask any questions they have and to celebrate who they are! Our favorite part is how it talks so positively about birth parents. She talks about how smart and loving the birth parents are. She then says, "That's adoption honeybear. It's the most loving thing someone can do." Such a sweet, simple and incredibly true statement!

Media Monday: You're Not My REAL Mother

You're Not My REAL Mother by Molly Friedrich

We give this 4.5 out of 5 stars!

Here is a summary from Good Reads:
What are some of the qualities of a real mother? She's nurturing--she'll let you put twenty Band-Aids on a bruised knee when you only need one; she's dedicated--she'll drive miles out of her way to retrieve your beloved bear left behind; she's playful--she catches fireflies with you after bedtime . . . and much, much more. Drawn from the author's everyday life as an adoptive parent, this cheerful yet tender parent-child conversation offers a response to children who've ever asked an adoptive parent why they don't look like one another. Gentle, lighthearted watercolors by Christy Hale complete the picture of a very special relationship. Here is an invaluable companion for adopted children--and the adults who love them--as they explore the emotional realities of a different kind of family.

Our Thoughts: We love how it points out that looking alike isn't what families/mothers are all about. A true mother is there to care for, help, teach, love, raise a child and so much more! We love that the daughter realizes for herself what makes her mother her mother, even when she doesn't look like her. The only thing we would change is to add the father into the story and to have it be an open adoption, where the child can see/know their birth parents. It is a very cute and fun story to read.

Media Monday: My Family is Forever

My Family is Forever by Nancy Carlson

We give it 4 out of 5 stars.

Here is a summary from Good Reads:
Some families look alike, and some don't. Some families are formed by birth, and some families are formed by adoption. But being part of a family isn't about who you look like or even where you were born it s about the special love that binds you together forever.

Our Thoughts: We love the name of this book! The drawings are not our favorite, but the message is great. We love how confident this girl is about being adopted and how open her parents are in telling her about it. We love that it has a father and that it shows things that both the father and mother do with her. We love that she finds things that she does that are like her parents. She also wonders about her birth parents and if they look like her or read like her. We are hoping for an open adoption where the child would know their birth parents and know how they look like them. We love that families are forever!